After careful reading of your replies and comments and looking at the results I have decided that with a few changes I can make things easier for you and for me and enable me to continue to host Five On Friday. For those interested in the statistics, I have given them at the end of this post.
I have decided that Five On Friday continues, with changes.
In future I will schedule a link up post to be published every Friday morning, about 1am UK time and the link in the post will remain "live" until about 11pm UK time on Monday. That allows more time for joining in and linking up as some of you said you didn't like the fact that you thought you could only link up on Friday. The link did always remain live until Saturday evening, but this extends it further. I cannot leave the link open all week because it will be too much for me to take care of.
This post will just be the link up post, no post from me and no comments on that post.
As for my own posts, I may not join in every week, but I will try to. On the weeks that I do join in I will do a separate post that I will link up in just the same way as you can link your posts. This means that Five On Friday can continue even if I am otherwise occupied, on holiday, don't have anything to share and so on. Joining in with a post every week has been a lot of pressure - self induced I admit, but still a lot - and I just cannot continue with that. This way I am just the same as you are and can come and go as I please and I will have comments open there just like any other post. If I don't post it doesn't mean I am not joining in, I just need to miss a week, just as I am sure that you sometimes need to.
I will still ask that you go and visit other participants and leave them comments. Although some of you said this put you off taking part, others said this was what you liked most so I don't want to stop encouraging this. No one is going to check if you have visited anyone or left any comments. It is your choice and there has never been any "requirement" to comment anywhere. So this is up to you. I just think that if you are joining a party it is fun to visit with the other people there!
Also regarding comments and visiting, I will be just like you from now on, I will try and visit as many of you as I can and leave a comment, and if I don't get there, it isn't personal, it is just because I cannot get to everyone all of the time. I understand - I suspect more than any of the other participants - the pressure of visiting and commenting, and that is why I know that you will not all visit and comment on the posts of everyone who takes part. I have never expected that you will, and in future I am afraid that I will also not expect it of myself.
That is it for what will be happening with Five On Friday, I hope that this will be easier for all of us and you will know that no matter what the link will be there every week (apart from Good Friday and over the Christmas/New Year period when I do not feel it appropriate to have link ups). It should be smoother moving forward.
These changes will start with the first Friday in December - next week. I may or may not be posting for the next few weeks myself, I cannot say at the moment as I am incredibly busy and need to put my attention elsewhere for a little while. I do hope to join in though.
I hope you will all be happy about this. I know that it makes me feel much better and I hope the consistency and explanation about commenting and the additional time will all make you feel better about Five On Friday too.
In other life thinking, as I said, I am still very busy, dealing with Mans affairs is proving to be a very rocky road for many (personal!) reasons. It has caused me to reflect on the way that I react to others and they way they treat and react to me.
I think that you know, or could I hope guess, that my mantra - other than 🎝let it go, let it go🎝 - is to be kind. I will always try and do that, just as I always have. It has been a shock to me to realise that not everyone thinks the same way and being kind isn't their first priority. I am perhaps very naïve, but there you go. Turns out not everyone is trying to be kind as their first thought. It doesn't mean that they are being nasty, just that kindness isn't their first thought.
Thinking further about that, and trying to be charitable (!!!), I hope that it isn't so much that they are not kind, it is that they prioritise themselves first and sometimes that is what is needed. I don't mean being selfish, I just mean getting your priorities right.
Running around and running myself ragged putting everyone else first, trying to make them happy, going out of my way to be kind has left me exhausted. Physically and emotionally. The same goes for my dear Hubby.
I suspect (really hope!) that you will not notice any difference in me, but I am changing. Kindness is still my first thing and it is still what I am hoping for in myself and those around me. However, I also realise that putting myself and my husband first isn't such a terrible thing to do.
To that end, that is why I have made these particular changes to Five On Friday. I want to be kind to all of you, but I need to be kind to us and spending half of every week on one blog post isn't really being kind to me or my husband is it. The same goes for commenting in general.
Really all you may notice is that I sometimes miss a Five On Friday post for myself, and that you might see me less in the comments. You will see me more though than if I had quit blogging, which I was considering.
This isn't really how I want to finish this post, but it doesn't fit before I have said the above, so I will try and find something a little cheerier to end on in a moment.
Please remember that this is my blog. It is up to me to choose when I blog, what I write about and when and where I read a post and leave - or don't leave! - a comment. Just as that applies for me, it applies equally for you too. I think that we can all forget that and expect too much from someone else and from ourselves.
Your blog is for you, it isn't for someone else to tell you what to do. That cuts both ways.
Also, if someone doesn't like what you have written about, it is OK for them to just move along, either on that post or forever. You will never please everyone all of the time and in fact I have realised often you might not please anyone! So if you don't like something here or on another blog please do remember that and just quietly and peacefully move along. I don't want to lose any of you, but if my changes don't suit you, please feel free to move on. I will miss you, I thank you for your time here and I wish you all the very best in the future..
Let us all put kindness first and put ourselves very first and be kind to ourselves.
Actually that wasn't as bad as I thought it would sound!
I will leave you with the thought of love and kindness and as it was Thanksgiving in America yesterday, these words which I think are a good thing for us all to hear.
You can't go wrong with Charlie Brown can you. Or Snoopy of course!!
p.s. these are the results as at the last time I checked them.
Q1. Would you still participate in Five On Friday if I didn't include a post of my own each week and it was just a link up?
21.28% I don't join in so it wouldn't affect me
Q2. Would you still participate if I did a separate post with my Five things on the weeks that I did have something to share and then I just linked my post to the link up?
21.28% I don't join in so it wouldn't affect me
Q3. Would you still join in if Five On Friday was only once a month? Say on the first Friday of the month.
19.15% I don't join in so it wouldn't affect me
Q4. How often do you join in Five On Friday?
31.91% Every week
10.64% Three times a month
6.38% Twice a month
14.89% Once a month
8.51% Every two to three months
2.13% Every three to six months
0.00% Once a year
Q9. Assume Five On Friday is ending. Do you agree with the statement "I am sad to see the end of Five On Friday.
61.7% Agree strongly
21.28% Agree somewhat
0.00% Disagree somewhat
2.13% Disagree strongly
I haven't included the written replies for obvious reasons and apart from anything else because this is an anonymous survey.