Wednesday, 16 October 2013

Wordy Wednesday

It is a funny thing this blogging lark.  We post photos, write funny little tales, share our triumphs, but rarely our disasters.

I have two favourite poems, Daffodils by William Wordsworth.  I am not above quoting this out loud when walking in the Lake District I'm afraid!

The other poem is If by Rudyard Kipling.  When I left primary school (just before my 11th birthday), I, along with all my classmates who left at the same time, were presented with a copy of this poem.  Since then I have held the words of the poem dear to my heart.

My two favourite lines are "if you can meet with triumph and disaster, and treat those two impostors just the same" and "so hold on when there is nothing in you, except the Will which says to them: 'Hold on!". 

I find that those aspirations in the poem that apply to others I can achieve much more easily than those that apply to me.

I can keep my head mostly, but not when blamed by others.  I rarely trust myself and spend so much time doubting myself, I even doubt that you would believe me if I told you how much. 

I dread to share my disasters, and sometimes all I can hold on to, is holding on.

So, to return this to blogging, we post our triumphs, but keep our disasters to ourselves.  We might post the odd picture of a cake that went lopsided, or some crochet that turned into a tangled mess, but that is about it.

Rarely do we read of the difficulties and struggles in everyday life that we all face.  I don't know why this is.  Bloggers share so much of their lives, but hold so much back.  It is a sort of double life in a way.  If a problem is written about the readers jump to support the writer in the best of ways.  So it can't be a lack of support that holds us back.

For myself, I imagine that you have enough of your own life to contend with, and that you come here to be cheered not gloomed.

Probably crazy really, as I try to always support others, and am as willing to read of their difficulties and offer support as I am to read of their triumphs and joys.  I just don't imagine that others would want to read of my troubles.

Perhaps we should, in holding on, face those disasters with each other a little more often, so that we know that we are not alone.  It might help us to hold on a little more easily.

Amy

20 comments:

  1. Oh absolutely, one of the best things about blogging is the amazing encouragement and support between fellow bloggers, both with the joys as well as the sorrows. I occasionally steer clear of the news due to the doom and gloom but I am always interested in what is going on with fellow bloggers, both the good and the bad. I don't think you would need to worry about whether others would want to read your troubles - we all have them and sharing them often brings us closer as you say. I'm sure most bloggers at one time or another question just what to share, how much to share, the balance etc. But sometimes there are reasons people don't disclose more of their 'issues'. For example, my most frustrating problem with sharing the things that are currently weighing on my mind is that they involve not just me, but extended family members (who read my blog!) and so I feel I need to keep those things within the confines of a private e-mail or I write it in a Post anyway but keep it in 'draft' :-) Great Post Amy! Mel x

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    1. Thanks for your comment Mel, I bet that there are quite a few bloggers with all sorts of things in their drafts! Hope that you never have too many troubles to bear. xx

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  2. I think you are right about only publicly sharing the good. I find the same on Facebook as well as blogging.

    On the other hand, I think readers gravitate towards what they want to read. I've run across blogs that focus on chronic disease and their readers may suffer the same and connect with them. That's not what I am drawn to, but I think it is great that there is something out there for everyone :) Interesting conversation - wishing you a wonderful rest of your week, Amy!

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    1. I think that you are right, I am sure that anyone looking at my blog list could work out my interests quite quickly, so perhaps it is not so much what others write about, and more what we choose to read. Have a good week. xx

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  3. I understand what you're saying. The blogging community is great at supporting each other in good times and bad, so you shouldn't feel you have to hold back if there's things you want to blog about.

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    1. I'm not holding back, it was just something that I was turning over in my mind. Hope that you are having a good week. xx

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  4. I often think about doing this but the worst parts of my life involve certain people who aren't very nice, honest or kind. I'm afraid that talking about this on my blog would backfire because they could find it easily, this being the internet. So I keep it off the blog because it would only make things worse. Aside from that stuff, my life is truly wonderful and my blog is a reflection of that. The other stuff is better left un-shared. :)

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    1. It is very hard sometimes, but I think that you are right, it is not so much what you say as what you don't say. I don't imagine that anyone has a perfect life, it just depends on what we portray to others, for all kinds of reasons. As I said above I am not holding back, but you might have noticed a few things missing in what I talk about here, and there are reasons for that, but as you say life is pretty good really. Have a great rest of the week. xx

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  5. Very interesting topic, Amy...
    I totally agree...I like to read about happy, lovely, beautiful things...and I try to portray that in my posts...
    I do have a few bloggy pals who have their ups and downs...and it is rewarding when they pull themselves up...and out!!
    No ones life is perfect...or...they are kidding themselves...but no one else...
    I save my dreariness for my closest friends....aren't they lucky??!! haha!
    So...
    Let's stay upbeat....carefree...and loose....
    It is a cleansing thing...this blogging...and I love it!
    My dear friend Leslie got me started...and I have never looked back...2 years tomorrow!!!

    Cheers!
    Linda :o)

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    1. I think that if anyone thinks their life is perfect they are either living in a dream or trying to kid someone that is for sure. It is just that some are better at what they portray than others. Not sure if I want to be one of your closest friends or not... just kidding! Happy blogaversary (there is no way that is a real word spelt that way!) for tomorrow - make sure you mention it in your post! xx (did you get what I sent you?)

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  6. I like best the blogs that offer a balanced view of life ... lots of life's good things but ready acknowledgement of life's bad ... I think we can share our woes sometimes without making others feel woeful.

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    1. Hi Annie, I guess that it has to be up to the blogger to decide how much and what they share. As long as someone is honest in what they do, I guess that is all we can ask. I agree that it is good to share your woes without making others woeful, a very good thing to bear in mind. Hope to see you here again, thanks for stopping by. Amy xx

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  7. Hi Amy and thanks so much for being my latest new follower - much appreciated. As a little example of the subject of your post, I go to a knitting/crochet group on Wednesday evenings and in the main, it's a lovely little gathering and we all get on really well EXCEPT for two ladies who turn up and do nothing but relate stories with great relish of who's died/dying/about to die in the village and personally, I find that just a little too much to deal with of a Wednesday night! Ok, that's everyday life, this I'm well aware of but I'd rather not have it as the main topic of discussion for a knitting/crochet circle! So maybe that's why folks hold back with their blogging - it's all about getting the right balance really, isn't it?

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    1. This is a tough one isn't it, the ladies probably don't have anyone else to share their sad news with so they share it with your group, but the rest of the group are probably there for different reasons (knitting and crochet!). It is hard though when some people do seem to take such delight on others misfortune. I have to deal with someone who takes a great deal of delight in others problems, and I know that I find it very hard to handle. I hope that you don't find this too hard and that you can just enjoy the rest of the group.

      Thanks for stopping by to visit, hope to see you again, and looking forward to reading more of your blog too!

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    2. What a thoughtful post. I have to say that if you chose to share your troubles here you'd find a very sympathetic and supportive group of people. I think many - including me - use their blogs to indulge and share the things that bring them happiness, which can create a false impression of how wonderful someone's life is. Also, it's tricky to navigate the line between privacy and sharing. Take care Amy. xx

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    3. I agree Gilliam, it is a hard thing to decide between what you share and what you don't. I guess that everyone has to work this out for themselves, depending on what it is that troubles them, who it affects and how. We are all different, and that, I always say, is a good thing - imagine if everyone crocheted (although!!). You take care too, and I hope that any troubles that may come your way in life will pass very quickly. xx

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  8. HI Amy I have added your name to my giveaway! I am your latest follower too!
    This post is very interesting. I (along with lots of bloggers no doubt) dont blog about the failures, worries and disasters in my life (well most of the time anyway!) because I worry about trolls and nasty people leaving horrible comments (and you hear about it all the time). Blogging is form of escapism for me, some people might read my blog and think I have a nice life with loving family and that is true to a certain extent but I have plenty of crap along the way and I dont think many people would want to read about it.I might briefly touch on something but not dwell on it. I have got to know some bloggers as friends and we privately email so I sometimes do go into detail then.Anyway, a good subject to tackle. Looking forward to getting to know you Amy.

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    1. Thanks for visiting Anne and for your comment, I agree with what you have said here. My policy for comments is that I will post anything that is not nasty, whether I agree or not, nothing that is spam and nothing that is nasty to me or anyone else. Seems to be working - so far! Looking forward to getting to know you too Anne. xx

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  9. Honestly, sometimes I think that if I blogged about all the negative things happening in my life or about the scary thoughts I have (remember, my son is on his 5th deployment to Afghanistan) I could probably increase my traffic a million-fold! Because people LOVE to hear sad/bad stories - mostly because it makes them feel better about their own circumstances. But in the end... I blog about what I want to blog about and it does my heart better to remain positive - I feel that by remaining positive I help myself and thereby lift someone else who may need it too.

    xo

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    1. Perhaps that is why some people leave comments about bloggers acting as though they have perfect lives because they are looking for some misery. I think that it is nicer to read nice stuff though, as it can inspire you to all sorts of new experiences and things if you let it. I like your happy blog Janet! xx

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